My Top Tips for Planning a Wedding (So Far)

1. Always include your fiancé. It’s his day too. As a couple, it is your day. Think of his ideas, needs, wants, preferences. Sometimes, this is will not be helpful or you will hate it. But sometimes he will come up with great ideas. (Like say no to the groomsmen in chicken suits unless that’s your thing, but yes to a really cool alternative processional idea.) Men can think outside the box when it comes to weddings. They don’t know and don’t care to know the rules, so they have no qualms about breaking them.

2. Keep an open mind. Not about everything, but most things.

3. You don’t have to visit 15 florists. If someone you know and trust says that so and so is amazing, go see their work. If you like it, why bother going anywhere else? Do you really have that much time or need that much more stress? Seriously?

4. Make the focal point of your wedding the ceremony. I know planners say no focus your energy on the reception because that’s what counts. Seriously? No, what counts is expressing your love for each other. People are coming to see you GET MARRIED not eat, dance, or whatever other reception plans you have. Yes, the party is important, but NOTHING… NOTHING… NOTHING is as important as your vows. Remembering this takes you back you what this day is really all about.

5. Good photography will last you forever.

6. Keep it simple. Do you need to try 45 different cake combos? No. Do you need to see every linen in the building? No. Do you need to see 5 people about a tiara? Do you even need a tiara?

7. Think about your choices. Ask yourself if they reflect you and your man. If not, why the hell is it in your wedding? Because someone somewhere once said you had to do it?

8. The world won’t end if you buck some traditions, but pay close attention to your manners. It’s important to do things correctly. For example, you can address your outer envelopes to Mr. Smith and Mrs. Smith or Mr. and Mrs. Smith or The Smiths or Jane and Jon. It doesn’t matter. However, please for the love of god consider people’s feelings. Yes, it is your day, but other people count. Just do what you would normally do in a situation where you need good manners. Heck I get mail now address to Mr. and Mrs. B. And we aren’t married yet.

9. If something small doesn’t go your way, like your bridesmaids are clueless and unhelpful. Shrug it off if it’s not major (major is not showing up to your wedding or other important event without letting you know… minor is not calling you back about ribbon colors) because believe it or not they have lives to and I bet they don’t revolve around you. Does your life revolve around them? Shrug off the small things. You will love your life so much more.

10. Music is sentimental and important. Pick music that feels right to you. Even if it is the Ramones. But for the love of god.. LISTEN TO THE WHOLE SONG! If it’s clearly got a breakup or inappropriate theme (like you are in a church I’m not sure if the Apple Bottom Jeans song is quite the pick for you). Also, unless it was your song and you are dead set on it… please don’t play the same song you’ve heard at every wedding you have been to this year. Example: Bless the Broken Road has been played at EVERY wedding I have been to the last 2 years. We refuse to play it.

the wedding lull

I'm seriously loving this dress from Holly Stadler. Lovely. It'd be a perfect beach or informal wedding dress. I contemplated buying it. However, my wedding dress budget already strapped, my mom suggested that we go to the lady who made my prom dress my junior year as a knock off of the red "jump dress" in Titanic. It was $100. She said perhaps she could make something similar in design to this since she makes wedding dresses. I am going to check when I go home. If it is about $100, Jonathon said to get it. I'll wear it to the after party and for pictures we will have made at TWC in our formal wear.

I believe it is a lovely knock off (though I'm sure not what Holly intended) of the Claire Pettibone dress that I adored, longed for, and loved.

Not a ton of stuff is going on. I mailed my bridesmaids their lookbooks. Jane, Kourt, Court have gotten them for sure. I haven't talked to my other girls yet. Court already has her dress! And this story made me happy. She had to buy a dress for another wedding that is one of the colors I said they could get. She said she didn't know where she was going to be able to wear it again. So she'd be out the money for the dress for one time use. She asked if it was okay if she wore it to my wedding. I happily agreed. That is what I wanted for my girls: to be able to wear them again. Jane is using the opportunity to get a new J.Crew dress. She said it's a great reason to splurge and a good excuse to buy the J.Crew dresses she loves. So, that is good.

I'm sending out my Save the Dates this week, I hope. I ordered cute stickers from our engagement session (the first one) for the back from Moo. I hope to get them this week. We've already stamped them. Now, all we have to do is get the stickers and we are set. As soon as they go out... pictures!!

Look Books

Finally, here are the images from the look books I set my bridesmaids and flower girls. I also included another letter from me, some images from magazines, and my dress for them to compare. Each one is different. I have a massive amount of these pictures. So if you want to see more let me know. And I can show you more.

My overall look idea for each girl. It's basically just an idea for inspiration... a launching board so to speak for each girl.

This image is from my flower girl's look book. I included several dresses, shoes, and accessories for her as well.

A look at how I got them bound. I found this beautiful ribbon and thought, hey I should use that. So I left trailing ribbon at the top and bottom of each book. I mailed them out yesterday so I can't wait to hear from the girls about them!

Today will be a busy posting day. I have much to share. And I've been super busy all week. My latest blog post (ban.do or don't) is up at OWD blog. Check it out here.

I love Betsy Johnson!! If any of my bridesmaids wore any of these dresses I'd be smitten.

Let me start by saying I am not (NOT!!!) picking out bridesmaid's dresses. Nope, I am giving them options. I am letting them pick out their own dress. I want them to wear it again. I want them to think about our wedding when they wear them after the wedding. Yes, I would love my girl's to pick out a Betsy. But I refuse to pick it out for them.

Rocking: J Rock playing NCAA 09
Feeling: tired, but upbeat

(All dresses above are Betsy Johnson.)